dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
