I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize