if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
