Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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