Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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