yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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