Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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