living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
