Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
