i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
