when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
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