maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
