But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
