We're facebook friends in real life
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
