U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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