oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
