From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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