? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize