Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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