Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
