Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize