I can text with my tongue
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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