I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize