Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
