No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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