Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
