her vagine was all disorganized.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
