Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
