Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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