You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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