She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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