Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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