How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
