Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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