is wine microwaveable?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize