we have officially mastered the walk of shame
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
