That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
this just has baby written all over it
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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