Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
