If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
