we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
