Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
