Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
