Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
