Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Fuck me I smell like cheese
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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