unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
