I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
