Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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