Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
