brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize