U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
